Sunday, November 24, 2013

New Diagnosis?

I've hesitated to update you all up on what is happening here in Cincinnati, as we have had a possible different diagnosis, but were stuck in limbo waiting for test results, and then a trial on new medication, to assure they were correct.

I think I'm finally comfortable in our new diagnosis. I am seeing Solstice improve daily, and although she will still swell for the rest of her life, have pain for the rest of her life, it seems that we spent our life savings on a wrong diagnosis.  Borrowed money from friends to get by...let bills to to creditors...months of our time spent in hospitals.  Now, it did eventually lead us to a correct one, but in the meantime, I stacked up huge hospital bills, and most what is most discouraging is that by treating the wrong disease we made her pain worse instead of better.

That is the reason she was at death's door when we arrived here. The medications to treat HAE are far different than the ones to treat her new diagnosis. Chronic Idiopathic Angioedema. Idiopathic means essentially that they do not know where it comes from, and chronic of course means often and forever.  This disease is in the same group as HAE, it has almost identical symptoms, identical pain, identical triggers, EXCEPT IA (idiopathic angioedema) patients have a specific trigger to blood products.

You know like the plasma based medicines that we were giving her. So, they would stop the attack in her throat, but never touched her tummy or knees, and as they worked their way though, they caused another attack, which caused us to give her more, which caused another attack.. you see where I'm going with this.

The entire time we were slowly killing her when we thought we were doing the only thing we could to save her life.This is so difficult for me to type, knowing that I did such harm to my child, all while trying to help.

What's funny is that Vanessa Williams was putting her into a documentary about Idiopathic Angioedema, when we believed her to have Hereditary because she couldn't find a kid willing to do it with IA.  I should have picked up on that.  My life has a tendency of pointing things out to me. It's another matter if I am paying attention or not.

Hindsight... I seriously could just kick myself..

So, here is the story. We arrived in Cincinnati to see Dr. Johnathan Bernstein Thursday night, our appointment was at noon Friday.  Being a researcher and one of the top HAE doctors in the world, he wasn't much of a people person.  I had been sending medical records for a month at this point, so he had almost everything.  I brought in the most recent medical records, from the most recent hospital, and he accepted them and sat down at a desk that didn't face us.

He moved papers around, read a few things, and asked a couple of questions and then said "I don't think she has HAE."  Now, to give you background when I was on the HAE facebook group several people warned me against seeing him, saying that they had seen him and he had told them the same thing, but other doctors had assured them he was wrong. So, though I knew him to be at the top of his game, I still had that other info rolling around with it.  I mean you don't get to be on the National and International board of HAE if you're a dope.  Besides, it seemed to me that during my interactions with him, he seemed to be a caring fellow. (I'd been in contact for at least a month prior.)

So I say, okay sir, you're the man, what do think she has.  To which he replies, I have an idea, but I'm going to call my fellows over at Children's Cincinnati and get you inpatient at this facility.  We went and grabbed some lunch across the street, came back and waited about fifteen minutes while he made the calls, and true to his world he got us right into a room.  We went through admissions and then literally went directly into a room. This has never happened, we have waited up to 7 hours for a room before.  Still with the drive, the admissions it was probably close to 6 pm by the time we actually settled in.

The first few days were the weekend, hospitals don't move very quickly, and all the fellows and residents are on, they continued to treat her attacks with the meds we brought with and then brought some in from other places because they are so expensive and hard to get.  On Monday our real team assembled (we're the red team) and they spent a couple of days going mountains of records, on Thursday they came to me and said that the genetic test results had come in from National Jewish, and they were negative for HAE type 3.  They suggested that they believed it to be IA.  They started her on the new meds Friday, and now on Sunday already she is so much better, it's nearly a 180.  She is still attacking daily, but only daily, and I hope that we find a med list that improves that even more. She is walking (still has balance issues) but she can walk for up to 8 or 10 minutes at a time now. We are still at the point of trying meds, to see what works and what doesn't.  As many IA patients have a lot of sensitivities to drugs.

I was sure I was risking her life by bringing her here.  I was so scared she would come off the plane with permanent brain damage, or paralysis.  But I had no choice, and it turns out, it was the right choice.  The medications to treat this disease don't cost a million dollars a year.  They are made up of epi pens, steroids, and antihistamines, until they find another option.

I can't wait to call the insurance company and mention that the next time someone needs a medical transfer, they should give it.  If I hadn't had you all, or for specific to this case, Scott Archeletta to pay for our plane tickets we could not have come.  I have literally saved the insurance company millions of dollars, while saving my child's life.

This disease is also very rare, and the research on this one is even less than HAE.  I'm having issues finding information, because its usually just a paragraph or two on certain articles about HAE.  I asked my doctors for this, and they provided me with two articles that are exactly the same, 2 paragraphs of info that don't give much info.

Luckily we have Vanessa who is making the documentary Solstice and her music are set to star in #Lifewithoutafork and should be completed late in March.  I am attempting to utilize her as my patient advocate, but so far the hospital hasn't been too on board with outside assistance.  But as always I will continue to fight until my child gets the care and treatment she deserves.  I'm asking them to give her higher doses of antihistamines for a week or so, so we can kind of "reset" her body, as it's been in a constant attack for nearly five months.  One dose of one antihistamine is not working.

Their promise upon me coming here was that she would leave with her quality of life restored.  If she is up all night in attacks, with massive pain... how will she ever attend school?  Hold a job? Any of those things regular folk like and and I do?  They are assembling a care conference tomorrow, with everyone involved in her care to find a better plan.  I hope to be home for Thanksgiving, but for now everything is up in the air.

The hospital is amazing.  Really amazing, but I also feel that they prefer to air on the side of caution and are not always as aggressive as they should be.  After months in the hospital, I've learned how to mellow out, how to calm myself, and how to match their unwitting ability to talk in circles, and throw it back at them as they do me.  Maybe I have a future in corporate America after all, smile.

But for now, Solstice is getting better, she is still in a lot of pain, but so much better.  I am thankful for the hospital and the staff, and for the amazingly strong parents I have met here.  I can't believe some of the stories I have heard, and how often an illness in your child doesn't ruin either their or the parents life, but in fact makes us stronger, better, improved somehow.

As you can only cry so long before you have to stand up and start putting one foot in front of the other, even if you don't know what direction to go.

Special thanks to my friends, Elli & Adam Roustom, their staff, and the entire Vail Valley for the pulled pork fundraiser last week at Blue Plate.  Though we still have a long way to go before we can find our way back to where we were financially, you not only gave us some to start, you also rewired my heart, and reminded me that I am not alone in this fight.  I don't have to put my head down and be her only voice.  There are many people that are willing to help, and that is the best feeling one in my position can imagine.

Thursday, November 21, 2013

Please Visit Blue Plate Today for lunch and Support Solstice

Thank you to everyone who has donated money, the Vail Daily and Randy Wyrick for the fabulous story, KYZR for radio spots, Copy Copy for printed materials, and most of all Chef Adam & Elli Roustom for donating their restaurant, their time, the food, and most of all for being true friends.

Monday, November 18, 2013

Cincinnati Children's Hospital

We made it to Cincinnati, at 4 am. The flight was delayed due to issues with the plane. We were all loaded on 50 minutes late, then unloaded to wait for another plane. This was after being stopped at security for the 50,000 dollars worth of drugs that were in our bag as carry on along with needles and such. That wasn't as big of an issue as the fact that my laptop tested positive for bomb materials. I know I'm explosive, but come on...

So, though the first part of the late plane was a blessing, it stressed Solstice out, and she had to self infuse in the middle of the airport. We had been preparing her for this flight for days by pumping her full of drugs it worked! This video makes me smile.     By the time we boarded the flight I had been awake for nearly 48 hours. I ordered a wine, took a drink and passed out instantly. Our friends from Leadville Jessie and Brett live just 2 hours away in Northern Kentucky, and Jessie drove up and took us to the hotel. Thank goodness she's a patient person, as she waited over three hours at the terminal. Friday, Brett drove up and picked her up, and they loaned us one of their cars until the 23rd. Such wonderful people to go out of their way.

We made it to Dr. Jonathan Bernstein at noon later that day and within a few minutes were told that Solstice's symptoms did not line up completely with HAE. He stated that either she has HAE, and something else additional that is creating non-stop attacks, or she has been misdiagnosed. He immediately placed us in Children's hospital.

I feared flying because I know for certain in my heart there is something going on in her brain. She loses her vision, and she has these seizure like things during an attack. They are getting worse everyday, and her attacks are coming on faster and faster. I seriously believe we got here just in time. Mama instincts are powerful things.

This is the hospital where HAE was discovered as a disease. They are testing her for another form of Angioedema called Idiopathic, and our genetic mapping test results should be in by the 20th.

Cincinnati Children's Hospital is a totally different place than most hospitals. This morning Ryan Seacrest was in the Lobby as he just opened a studio for kids to record down there. Daily a massage therapist is sent in to Solstice to help her relax, and parents are also allowed to be massaged. I just finished receiving one.. not a bad perk. They take care of parents as well as children here, and that is a far cry from what we experienced in Denver.

 My team of doctors are focused and caring, and they run in two week intervals, so you don't end up with a different doctor every day. I can see why they are rated so highly, even with just being here a few days.

They treat the mind, body, and spirit here and want to begin working on getting Solstice back to enjoying life. They stated that it's very possible that we could be here for months, depending on what happens. I've been living in the hospital for close to three months already, so I'm getting very used to the concept. It's amazing to finally feel like we are getting somewhere, that these people are actually going to help us. They have the knowledge to do so, and appear to really care, it's like a nice deep breath of clean mountain air after being suffocated with bullshit for so long.

Thank you to everyone who has helped so far, we still have a long way to go, but with your love and prayers, I think we are going to come out on the other side....

Special Thanks to Elli Roustom and Chef Adam for putting together the pulled pork fundraiser. Vail Valley friends, please attend!

or if you can't attend, you may donate online by clicking the link below: https://www.giveforward.com/fundraiser/03g3/help-solstice-get-to-cincinnati

Wednesday, November 13, 2013

Fly Frontier?

So, we've changed out mind about our trip. I am so worried about flying due to increased pressure and elevation on Solstice's brain, because I know her brain swells. Though it is not a normal symptom of HAE, it has been found in very rare cases. She loses her vision, she has little mini seizures. So I've been scared to death to fly her, but at the same time the concept of driving through Kansas is just as scary. So, we are going to dose her up with Cinryze and Firzyr a couple of hours prior to the flight, this should control her swelling and avoid an attack while on the plane. Cross your fingers the plan works, because it's the best one we've had so far. We found a flight for tmr night on Frontier, I'm going to wait an hour or so, and see if any of you fine folks happen to have some discount abilities, as the tix are almost 600 for just Solstice and I Scott Archeletta of Arch Electric picked up the tab for these two flights, and Greg's parents called right after speaking with Scott (I didn't want to ask him for more than we actually needed) and offered to buy tickets too, so I asked them to buy Greg's.. which is really good, because I do a lot better with him around. He calms me, puts things in perspective. My wild ideas aren't always the best way. I'm a lucky girl, to find someone who loves Solstice and I so much! I will write more soon! Thanks for your support!! Amanda

Tuesday, November 12, 2013

Something's not quite right....

I woke up today filled with a weird feeling that something was headed my way.  I got so nervous about it, I immediately threw up.  My stomach must have known as well, because every single item I ate last night was purged, not that I eat much these days anyhow......

You see, this pile of horrible stuff that's been hitting us like we're a moving target, every single time I got this feeling... sometimes two days before, sometimes 3 weeks.  But this one is big, of that I am certain.  After spending eight days in the hospital, we went home for 3, had a trip to my favorite ER at Boulder Community Hospital, and then back for inpatient at Rocky Mountain Children's Hospital since Thursday.

Solstice has been saying for days that she feels as though she is going to die.  Not that she wants to die, but that she just has a feeling about it.  When she says this my heart breaks, as I am not all that certain she won't... unless I can get her to a specialist.  This disease has a 33% death rate.

I've not stopped trying to get her help.  I have called everyone I know, asking for information.  I've pulled favors in Austria that got me an email address of a famous HAE researcher, I've begged my friends and family for money.  I call places all day long, trying to find someone to help her.  Greg too has tirelessly fought to try to find an organization that can help us.  She can't fly, she must be in a medically equipped ambulance for 17 hours.

Solstice takes Cinryze and two other very expensive medicines Berinert and Firzyre, to stay alive. Running out of options, on Friday I begged Firzyre to help me. Earlier today, I cried and begged Cinryze to help. She desperately needs medical transport, and insurance will not pay.

We have been in the hospital for pretty much four weeks solid, except for a couple of days out.   She just gets more sick everyday,,,,and no doctor knows what to do here in Denver, because they have never even seen the disease before plus she has a super severe case.

Which is why I was grasping at straws calling the big drug companies, asking them for help while they took my monthly order with a $9000 co-pay.

You'll never guess what happened... they  declined to help... and so here I sit still in Denver with a child who's life depends on being in Cincinnati. Stuck with an insurance company that won't pay... while they walked away with 4.2 billion dollars getting rich off my child's disease.

If only I could unleash the expletives that come to mind when I think this through....

This was part of her attack earlier tonight... this one came on within minutes. These happen to her almost daily, where is my angel?
 


https://www.giveforward.com/fundraiser/03g3/help-solstice-get-to-cincinnati

Saturday, November 2, 2013

Solstice's strength

I have always known Solstice to be strong, I taught her to stand up for herself, to help others in need.  During her years in Leadville she watched over the handicapped kid in her class, made sure others didn't make fun of her, or hurt her.

If someone is out of line, Solstice was always the first to speak up, the first to call others out on their thinking.  She never has gotten in trouble at school, and here at home, she only really ever got in trouble for mouthing off.  Not sure where she learned that from .. ha

I have always imagined that Solstice will grow up to be a person who made serious change in the world.  Someone you'd be proud to call a friend.  An excellent student, she has always taken school so seriously.  She has not been to school in nearly 2 months. As a ski racer her entire life, now in a wheelchair because the swelling of her legs is so intense she cannot walk.  It's a hard pill to swallow for her, and for us.  We desperately need to find a specialist, but none are to be found in our area.

We have spent everything on co-pays and specialists.  Our savings is gone and we no  longer have the ability to take her to the places she needs to go for help.  As our knowledge of the disease grows, we are finding our mistakes along the way.  We are asking for help.  We have an online fundraiser going, but it has proven to not quite make the amounts required, since out of state care will not allow the use of medicaid.  I had to quit my job in order to qualify to make sure she had the care she needed, as our primary insurance company keeps denying us.

After eight days in the hospital, yesterday for the first time she asked to do something.  She didn't even turn on the television during her stay in the hospital, too sick to even watch tv is a rough state. We went to the Denver Museum of Nature and Science.  She had a lot of fun, but was worn to bits by the time she got home and slept nearly 20 hours. She's awake now, and her spirits are lifted a bit by our outing, thankfully.

So, if you're reading this after the fundraiser is complete, and you'd be kind enough to donate to her cause, please email me for our address.  I have been humbled by this situation, and I no longer am bothered by asking for help.  We need your help, if you're willing to give it... I will be forever grateful.

Amanda